How to be a jerk at your friends’ weddings: I’m sorry, I’ve already had my cake and eat it too

If you’re not into a lot of the “funny” or “flirty” side of things, you’ll likely be better off avoiding the weddings you know and hate.

If you have to attend the event, be sure to wear something that will make your friends happy, and avoid the bridal party.

If they don’t want to attend, be prepared to be very rude to them if you do show up.

I’m a big fan of a little flirty humor in a wedding, but it’s best to avoid things that are just too cheesy for your friends to handle.

I know I would have preferred that you had your cake and then a hug instead, but that’s just how it is.

So, here’s how to be the jerk that will take the cake and enjoy a nice kiss to the bride and groom.


Be funny.

You’re the only person who will be looking for a laugh.

Be the kind of person who’s willing to put up with someone’s awful behavior, and be able to laugh with them at the wedding reception.

Be as sarcastic and off-color as you can.

Your friends will enjoy it, and you’ll have the potential to become a much better host of a big reception than they are.


Get up to speed on the bride’s preferences.

It’s probably best that you first check with the bride to see if she’s happy with her choices.

If she’s not happy, then you can ask questions like, “Is there anything you’d like to see?”

If you ask a question that she’s uncomfortable with, be aware that you’re in the presence of an adult, so you should be able find a way to avoid this awkwardness.


Learn the ceremony.

You don’t have to learn everything at the reception, but you can learn a lot about what the bride wants, if she does.

I’ve found that if the bride is really excited about having a wedding in the future, you can get her to talk about it and be comfortable with it.

If not, it’s probably a good idea to have a chat with her beforehand and make sure she understands what she wants.


Make the party a great experience for everyone.

A big part of getting married is finding someone you can really trust to have the best of it, so it’s really important that you make sure everyone gets a great time.

If the bride doesn’t want you there, make sure you make your presence known, be loud, and don’t hold back on what you want.

If your friends don’t like you, they might feel a little more at ease when you’re at the party.

It might be better for everyone involved if you just have a good time and aren’t there to do anything too awkward.


Be nice to everyone.

You can’t have an awesome wedding without a nice reception.

If it’s going to be your first or only wedding, make your wedding a little memorable for everyone, and do it well.

If a couple is feeling nervous, it can be helpful to give each other a little bit of a pep talk.

If someone is going through some rough times, they can ask you to do something fun or helpful for them.

Try to help them relax, but don’t be too aggressive or confrontational.

If this happens, make it a point to just keep smiling and being happy, instead of acting overly hurtful.


Get some candles.

The wedding is about getting to know your friends, so make sure that the candles are well lit and sparkle.

If that means getting some candles for your friend’s room, be creative.

Use an antique or old-fashioned candle, or make your own.

The more the merrier!


Have fun.

There’s nothing more fun than having a great wedding and having a good group of friends.

If everything goes to plan, you might be surprised at how good your wedding can actually be.

But if you’re looking to make your bridal group a little special, you’ve come to the right place.

And you may want to consider making your friends your first wedding guests as well.

Let me know what you think about my suggestions.

You might also enjoy my articles about wedding planning: How to make a great first wedding planning post, How to organize your wedding, Wedding planning tips for single women, Wedding ideas for couples, and Wedding advice for single men.


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